Sample: Writing "Adventure 101"
This is a record of what I was thinking while I wrote the song. I wrote this essay while writing the song.
1. Type
This is a sequel song. There are two important consideration when you want to write a sequel:
#1: Does the original song leave you wanting more?
#2: Does the original song leave room for expansion?
This is a sequel to "Five Full Moons of Formalhaut Four". In this case, the answer is yes to both for the same reason-there are a lot of little suggestions that beg for expansion.
2. What I have to work with
I reviewed the lyrics to "Five Full Moons" and wrote down everything that left room for expansion. I should point out that during the writing of "Five", these were added for setting and character development; there was no secret meaning for any of them (really, I was only writing "Five" at the time, not both it and this one), so I'm free to do what I wish with them. Here are the highlights (some items were not useful or relevant):
"the only way to take the frontiers farther"
-what other ways were tried?
-we've met some explorers; what about the settlers?
Both of these questions are material for another song. All the other ideas pointed to picking up where the story left off, so I'm setting these aside for some other day.
"we headed into space to the School of Last Chances for Adventure 101"
-Nice double meaning-their 101st adventure, and an introduction.
-Where do they get their leads?
"any one of a thousand things to go wrong"
-What are some of these things?
-What steps do Jumpers take to safeguard against them?
"Hot-Hand Harry did a hundred and four"
-What happened on #105?
-Anybody else try to break the record? Anybody else come close?
"we couldn't believe that he was still alive"
-Do our heroes have a history with Cap-Crazy Charlie?
-Even if they didn't, is he going to come after them now?
"the newest good-luck charm around my neck is a claw"
-What else is around his neck? What stories do those items have?
-What does Moxie wear?
"the only name my gal has ever used is Moxie"
-So, it isn't her given name? When did she pick it and why? Does the narrator know?
"look at your bride on your wedding day"
-Did the narrator look at Moxie (before the ceremony) on their wedding day? What happened then?
-Are they even married?
3. Errors in the original
These are points that don't quite work. I can either fix them or ignore them.
"Planet 4's a paradise"
OK, Astronomically, how are going to get an Earthlike paradise that 1) is big enough to have five moons, each of which can keep a space station in its Lagrange 1 point, and 2) orbits a hot, giant star? Best to leave this one alone; even if I have an answer, it won't satisfy the sticklers. Suspend disbelief and move on.
"there were hatchlings in his nest"
The suggestion, rather dirty, is that Charlie has been breeding with a beast. Alternatively, he's been breeding with another were-pteranodon, but then are the kids reverting to human form in an eyrie? I'd be willing to explore these issues if it came up, but I don't expect that to happen unless someone revisits Formalhaut Four.
Is using humans to explore singularities really the best way? Probably not. You'd send robotic probes. This is more of a sport than a profession, and it's unlikely they'd make the kind of money they talk about having. This too is something I'm going to ignore because I don't have a good answer. However, I will have to consider the hows and wherefores of the business and also the tools and tricks of the trade, which probably include sending probes.
4. The hook and the meat
In this case, the hook is set up beautifully in the last verse of "Five": they're going off for 101, and it's pretty clear they're gunning for Hot-Hand Harry's record.
The meat of "Five" is that they hit a milestone-100 singularities successfully explored-and did something special to celebrate. What can they do to top that? They can break the record, which means they'll have to go through five singularities in the course of one song (presumably a single mission). They might also do something they've never done-something they've hesitated to do. The milestone may have given them enough hubris to try something crazy. That of course raises the question, Exactly what would it take to scare these two borderline psychotics?
I'm also going to work with a musical hook: I want some audience participation. My idea is to have the audience shout out antonyms in the chorus, so I'll need to set up some leading lines: "Black is _____! Day is ______!" Also, I've made a list of opposites for handy reference and screened out any that would be confusing (Right = Left or Right = Wrong. I can use it, but Right will have to be the audience response, so Left and Wrong aren't available for rhyming.)
5. Developing the story
A. I have to get through five singularities in one mission. That means, basically, something goes wrong. They expect to go through and come back.
B. These are seasoned explorers, so it will have to be something really bad that they haven't encountered before. I'm sure they've heard of it, but they haven't dealt with it.
C. Our heroes have a history, which may well affect them. Charlie might come after them. They might go looking for Harry. They might have other enemies or competition interfering with them setting a new record. They might run into civilians. Any detail of their history from "Five" can be a basis for events.
So, what is something horribly bad they haven't encountered? How about something all pilots fear and nobody's come back from, like a Bermuda Triangle of space? Let's see... the basic assumption of using singularities for travel is that they connect two points. Suppose it was only stable at one end? Every time you go out, you wind up in a different place. (This idea is a science fiction staple, appearing in Sagan's _Contact_, an episode of ST:TNG, and a hundred books and shows based on the concept of a leftover network of stargates).
Pilots would have a cute name for such a thing. You go into a place where the rules of physics are degenerate. Alice in Wonderland comes to mind (stick with the classics, I always say). Let's call it a Rabbit Hole.
Let's work out a basic plot for the five singularities:
1) They follow a lead to a singularity-possibly the place Harry disappeared
2) They exit and are lost, as expected, so they go back in; unexpectedly, they do not return to the starting point, and they are lost.
3) They go back in, and get stuck.
4) They create a singularity while stuck inside one to form an escape route. Now they're out, but they have to get back to civilisation.
5) They find or create one to get home.
Now let's resolve some plot points:
1) Where do they get the lead? Could come from some kind of dispatcher, or from someone they talked to in the Cantina at Formalhaut Four, or it could be where Harry disappeared. For the first two, I need to introduce some additional, probably historical, source and a motivation for that source to inform or misinform them. But our characters already have a jones for Harry's record, so that's my first choice.
2) How do they know they're lost? How long does it take to check starcharts? What else do they check? All that's important to keep the story moving is that they do know, so I'll make a note to be vague unless some inspiration hits.
3) How do you get stuck in a singularity from which you've already exited? There's something wrong with the exit, not the interior. It doesn't connect to anything. It can't go nowhere, so let's have it turn in on itself and form a Moebius strip. (Actually, it would be the 4-D or more-D equivalent of a Klein bottle.) That's a rich idea, and it's easily rhymed to boot.
4) How do they create a singularity? Their ship must have engines that allow them to enter one without getting destroyed. Their equivalent of a warp core breach ought to do it, but wait, I don't want to destroy their engines-I still have a few jumps to go. I need another ship in the Klein bottle. That's no problem; they probably aren't the first Jumpers to wind up there. Actually, after one pilot failed to return, likely nobody else would try. So it must be Harry's ship, and they'll find Harry as well. Dead or alive? Probably dead; his disappearance didn't seem to be recent, and death is a sufficient reason for Harry not trying to get out.
5) For the last jump home, they won't have any other derelict ships to use to create another singularity, so they'll have to find one. The important thing is that they don't go back the way they came.
6. Developing the music
Now I have enough information to outline the lyrics, which will take some time (probably most of an hour). I don't want to start writing them yet, because I'll have to adjust them and the music to fit each other. So, let's get the music to the same point.
This is a sequel to "Five Full Moons of Formalhaut Four" and should have similar music. The simplest change is to go from minor to major. In fact, on guitar, the chords in the relative major are similar enough that I'll be able to do a lot of the same decorations and character.
So I pick up the guitar and try the C major chord, strumming with the same rhythm and doing the B-C suspension, just like in the original. It's appropriately upbeat, but the major seventh sounds too pretty, so I make it a dominant seventh. Now, that's a royal pain in C, so I go looking for a key where I can do that comfortably. I don't find one, so I try reversing the thought: in "Five", it was a 2-3 suspension in minor, so I try a 4-3 suspension in major. That works in several places, but I really liked the dominant seventh, which came closest to working in A major. Lucky me, the 4-3 suspension works well there too. I alter the pattern a little to go from 4-3-xxxx-7-1. Now I've got a groove.
Time for a chord progression. The key of A normally uses A, D, and E. My groove pattern works with minimal modification in both of those, so they're fair game. The relevant minor chords are b, c#, and f#. b and c# minor are barres of the a minor used in "Five", so that riff and its variations will work. f# minor allows a 7-1 with a dominant seventh in place of the 2-3, which will work for now at least if I need it. So those six chords are at my disposal. "Five" also changes to the relative major for the second half of the verse. The relative minor for A major is f#, which is no fun, but I might go to d minor or e minor or even (like in "Five") C major. After a lot of experimentation I settle on A7 D7 A7 E7 / A7 D7 E7 E7 / c#2 b2 c#2 b2 / c#2 f#7 E7 E7. I really like the parallels to "Five", with the switch between major and minor, the alternation between adjacent chords in the third stanza, and the E7 leading me back to the A7.
Now I have chords, no melody, for the verses, which is most of the song. The chorus, as I said above, will involve the audience shouting out opposites. That will require a pretty steady rhythm. The chorus of "Five" was toneless rhythmic scratching on the guitar punctuated by chords, most of them on the upbeat. "Black is and Day is " is the basic format. I'm hearing it as a steady quarter-note rhythm. Forget playing the guitar while the audience is shouting. So it's "chord chord chord / chord chord chord / transition / repeat". For the transition, I'll put in something to explain the audience's words in lyrical context, so it can be normal guitar playing and the performer singing. The second transition should lead right into the A7 chord of the verse. The start of the chorus in "Five" was a mild surprise chord (F major)-not out of the key, but a bit out of order in the progression, and from that first chord I went off in it's key as opposed to the established key. To get back to the verse, I had to make an abrupt change late in the chorus, going from Bb to E. Here, F major might work, but it's too similar, so the next closest related chord is C major. (Bb is also closely related, but going there from E7 is a helluva way to start the chorus. C is just odd enough to be attention-getting without being too jarring.) I'm not sure where to go from C, so I work backwards. The best way to lead back to A7 from the end of the chorus is to end the chorus on E7 (the dominant seventh of the relative fifth is always the strongest lead to a major or minor chord). To make it even better, I'd like to have the A chord in the chorus on the way to that E7 so it's established as something to get back to. Simplest answer is A, D, E7, but that's both too much like the verse and too much at odds with the C chord starting the chorus. In fact, A major is too much at odds with C major, so I make it a minor. A minor to E7 would be either a minor, d minor, E7 or a minor, G, F, E7. Easy choice-d minor may be compatible with C major, but the G and F strongly reinforce the C major. Now I just have to get from C major to a minor in the first four. No problem. Just about anything will work. I could just stay on C major the whole time, or go through F and G, but I like C d minor ? ? / a minor G F E7 better. To fill in the blanks, I lead into the verse and play a few, then hit the C d minor in context. By some combination of intuition and random chance, I find this: C d minor ? Bb / a minor G F E7. How to get from d minor to Bb major without using a minor, F, or C (they're all used in too close proximity-it makes the Bb seem like an unrelated thought, which it well may be, but I'm going to make sure it doesn't *sound* like it!). Well, the C - d minor progression suggests moving up the scale. C - d minor - e minor - Bb is jarring. C - d minor - e minor - G - Bb doesn't help much. C - d minor - Eb - Bb! We have a winner.
7. Writing the lyrics and melody
At this point I have an outline of the lyrics and a chord progression. Now I take the outline (what I want to say) and say it in the format of the chord progression and rhythm. Then I sing it and find out where it clunks. Revise, rinse, repeat, and we're done.
How do I get a melody out of that? Here are three techniques:
1) Treat it more or less like a talkin' blues. Over time, you'll naturally start to gravitate toward pitches on most of the vowel sounds.
2) Pick a note in the first chord and sing all the words to that note. When you come to a chord change wherein that note no longer fits, move to the nearest higher or lower note that does fit and keep going. When it gets too high or too low to sing comfortable, turn around and move the other direction.
3) Try to sing the melody from the original song. It won't fit the chords and probably won't fit the lyrics, so adjust it as needed. By the time that's done, you'll barely recognize it, but it will have some of the same character.
While putting lyrics in the chorus, I find that my chord progression is too short. I need it to be twice as long.
I have:
C d minor Eb Bb
a minor G F E7
I don't want to get to that Bb until I'm ready to move on the to a minor, so I fall back on basics to fill in the gaps.
C d minor F G
C d minor Eb Bb
a minor G F C
a minor G F E7
Frankly, it's an improvement.
As for lyrics: The opening of "Five" is philosophical, and I'd like to keep it parallel. After cogitating for a few days (on top of the whole song percolating for months on the back burner), I focused on the motivation for the start of the story-Hot Hand Harry's record and the mystery of his ending.
Where do they go when they never dome back?
Every Jumper finds out sooner or later.
At this point, I don't care about scansion. The lyrics and melody will compromise into something that fits the chords and rhythm. My main interest in rhyme right now is that it's an easy way to get ideas (find a word that rhymes, then get from point A to point B).
That first line has a good rhythm to it-there's a small catch between "go" and "when". Long vowels go well with longer notes. So "Where do they go" becomes three eighth notes and a longer note, probably an eighth tied to a quarter or another eighth. The first chord in the verse is Asus, which just begs to start on the sustained note and go to the neighbouring chord tone, D --> C#. This leads me to D C# B C#. It's too parallel to the accompaniment, so I invert it to B C# D C#. This is similar to the first few notes of "Five".
For the second chord, Dsus/D7, I could move the melody up a fourth, but I try to avoid being that parallel, and besides, I can't sing that high. Going lower would work, but that's what "Five's" melody does. If I'm going to follow the original at every turn, I might as well just write new lyrics and save a lot of trouble. But I don't wanna, and besides, the audience participation wouldn't fit. So the melody doesn't go down and can't go up. It stays where it is, which (adjusted for the new chord) is D. Problem is, if I start "When they never come back" on D, I'll be moving down like "Five" or up where I can't sing. So I lead into the D like before: B C# D C# / B C# D ? ? ?. Where should this line end? How about something edgy, like the seventh of the D7: B C# D C# / B C# D ? ? C. I like the way the C doesn't fit with the earlier C#. There isn't room to go from D to C in three notes, so I'll approach it from the other side (which also avoids a parallel fourth): B C# D C# / B C# D A B C.
I don't like the rhythm of "Every Jumper finds out sooner or later." I'll come back to that after I see where I'm going. Lacking ideas, I look at the follow-up points I have taken from "Five" (see above). Both 1) the question of others trying to break Harry's record and 2) the idea that there's a story behind every charm around a Jumper's neck seem relevant. This being the hook of the song, I need to imply an entire story in very few words. Since Harry's mystery is the set-up, encapsulate it into a symbol. Harry didn't leave anything but his legacy, and no human can wear that around their neck. Extending the metaphor, Sam defeated Charlie and took a token; the singularity defeated Harry, and his spectre hangs about it (Here There Be Dragons!).
Every singularity where a Jumper has died
Wears its victims like a chain/necklace
Bleah. What this needs is some character. Sam and Moxie are colorful, their slang equally so. What would they, half rogue and half physicist, call a singularity where someone died? Remember, they know there's one waiting for them (mmm, keep that thought handy for a verse). I've got it!
A Jumper's final resting place
Is on the neck of a Vanishing Point
That's better. Too good, in fact-it's a leading couplet, to be expanded. It should start the second phrase, where the chord goes to c#2. The minor is more appropriate for the thought anyway. To finish that stanza,
Where did old Hot-Hand-Harry
Go after number 104?
Needs rhythm, and the foreshadowing may be heavyhanded. Not sure. But it's something. Now I need to work the chorus; then all I have to do is tell the story. All else is preparation.
Drawing on my list of opposites, using rhyme to pick other lines, and checking rhythms against the chorus chords:
Black is (white) and Day is (night)
And everything you see is out of sight
Fast is (slow) and Young is (old)
When you dip into the gravity well
After is (before) and Under is (over)
When you fall into a Rabbit Hole
On, off, dead, alive, doesn't matter, can't tell
If we'll ever make to Heaven or Hell
...and now I'm ready to tell the story in verse.
8. Postproduction
Now that the song is complete, I'll practice it (because some of it isn't easy; that's the disadvantage of using music theory rather than talkin' blues to make a melody). Then I'll play it in front of people, see how they react, and adjust it, and repeat many times. Then, if it makes the cut, I'll arrange it for some group of instruments and record it. The road ahead is long, but from here the fun begins.
A7 D7 A7 E7
A7 D7 E7 E7
c#2 b2 c#2 b2
c#2 f#7 E7 E7
C d minor F G
C d minor Eb Bb
a minor G F C
a minor G F E7
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